MAKEUP TIPS!
In order to hide:
Redness- green
Sallowness- purple
Dark undereye circles- coral
Insecurity- gold
Secret crush- orange
Drug addiction- grey
Sadness- glitter
Seriously. Nobody will think you’re sad if you have glitter all over your face.
In case you are sitting on lots of holiday cash and don’t know what to do, I wanted to point out that Dave Vanian of seminal (huh huh) punk band The Damned has co-founded a high-end goffic makeup line called Illamasqua. Who better to do it than Dave? He’s been blending clown white and smudging black liner since Billy Joe Armstrong’s parents argued over whether the condom would hold. Anyway, Dave’s makeup line is is the culmination of my dreams in many ways.
Awesome things about Dave:
1. He is married to Patricia Morrison, formerly the bassist of Sisters of Mercy, and together they are the gothest couple ever. Everyone else should give up.
2. He once threatened to beat the tar out of Bauhaus’ Peter Murphy, for copying his “Vampire schtick”, not realizing that there was enough of it to go around for the UK, Germany, and the States for many years to come.
3. I have been in love with him, body and soul, since I was fifteen years old. All five foot six of him.
4. Screw you, Patricia Morrison!